Spreek je Engels?

When I wrote the first draft of this entry, it was on a two-day trip to the Netherlands with my pal Marc.

Athough I had a few phrases and a guidebook handy, English is a language that travels well. We were able to navigate the entire trip without a word of Dutch. For interest, I also brought my DAB+ radio and found two stations with English-speaking presenters: the BBC World Service for news, and Pidi for dance music. Last year, we visited Sweden and we enjoyed a similar experience.

While the prevalence of English was most helpful for us, I’m also concerned about playing into the stereotype of the monolingual Brit. (Caveat: I can fluently understand the Scots language, but since that doesn’t help outside the country, I’ll set it aside here.) English is the lingua franca of aviation, computer code, and a huge chunk of the world’s film industry. It’s not difficult to see the lack of incentive for learning a second language.

The only real way to make a difference is to learn one that I can keep in my back pocket for future trips to mainland Europe. There are three current contenders:

  1. As French is a working language of both NATO and the UN, this seems an obvious choice.
  2. However, the easiest to pick up personally would be Spanish, as I studied this at high school, and this is also a UN language.
  3. Or is there a case for taking up German instead? It should be relatively easy to find classes and learning resources for this.

Alternatively, is there some other language or some better solution I should consider? It feels like a small yet deliberate courtesy to make some sort of effort.

Meanwhile, at least Marc and I can be proud of not playing up to another stereotype: antisocial behaviour abroad. After a burger and a stroopwafel, we were back at the hotel by 8pm.

Dual Lingo

In mid-December, it was reported that the comedian Stanley Baxter had died at the age of 99.

He’s best known for the recurring Parliamo Glasgow sketches, which were a parody of the BBC language learning programme Parliamo Italiano. In each one, he and a co-presenter switch seamlessly from performing an example sketch in the Glasgow dialect to addressing the camera in the dominant Received Pronunciation of the day. Here’s one such example:

When you live in Scotland, it’s unusual even today to encounter your own accent or dialect on TV or radio, other than on dedicated Scots language stations. In this sense, ‘Scots’ refers to the Scottish dialect of English, with its distinct pronunciation, vocabulary and grammar.

The lack of prevalence is particularly true for Gaelic speakers, with only a handful of broadcasts dedicated to the language.

It’s possible that this situation might change in the future. Back in summer, the Scottish Languages Bill 2025 was unanimously passed by the Scottish Parliament, placing Scots and Gaelic on an equal footing with English.

If you’re an English speaker visiting Wales, your eye quickly learns to settle on the lower half of official signs because Welsh legally must be displayed first. Hopping across the sea to the Republic of Ireland, we see a comparable situation with Irish Gaelic, which is written into the constitution as the national language. Note that while Irish Gaelic is related to Scots Gaelic, the two are not mutually intelligible.

Back in Scotland, I don’t foresee change happening very quickly. There are already some dual-language road signs in the north, and at the majority of railway stations. Yet considering the cost of new signs, investment will likely only come to the rest when they reach the end of their life spans.

By that time, it’s possible that Scots and Gaelic education will become more widespread, generating the political momentum for a wider dual-language presence. Maybe one day, Parliamo Gaelic will be the norm.